Life & Death: It All Happens So Fast

Death. Is there an afterlife? Is there a heaven? Do our souls find a new home? Are we reincarnated? What is the difference between life & death & how does it work? 

The reason I'm all philosophical today is because I just learned that someone I went to high school with was murdered in a suspected attempted murder-suicide. She died, he lived. However, the case is still open & detectives are still trying to piece together what truly happened. 

There is a definite difference in the real world versus crimes we see on Law & Order or CSI. On the television shows, they magically catch the guy every time & justice is served. In the real world, it could take months & years before the truth is understood & sometimes it never is. And sometimes justice or closure is never served.

life & death

I didn't know this woman very well. I'm not entirely sure I ever met her but I did know who she was. We went to school together. We were even Facebook friends for some time. I met her brother at a party once & we had a conversation which I can't even recall. She was really into fitness & kickboxing & softball; she'd lost a lot of weight & was a positive body image role model. 

I stumbled upon a Facebook post about a death right in the city I live in. So close to home & most definitely close to my heart. Right now I'm trying to wrap my head around the fact that she's gone. Her mind, body, & soul cease to exist on this earth.

I feel sad about this person whom I hardly knew, so I couldn't imagine what her family is going through. How they reacted when they first got the call. How they're coping today. How empty their home must feel. Life & death: it all happens so fast. Cherish every moment because you don't know if it's your last. Be kind to others. You never know who is hurting or struggling or needs the light of your kindness. 

In honor of those whose lives are cut short, hug your loved ones a little tighter tonight. Send your love to your family & friends. Contact an old friend. Do something kind for a stranger. We only have one life. What will you do with yours?


My questions to you are: have you ever dealt with the death of family, friends, or even someone you hardly knew? What are your thoughts on death & the afterlife? What is one positive change you'd like to make during your lifetime?


Thank you for reading.

30 comments

  1. I've lost two school friends now due to road traffic accidents. It's been a number of years since it happened but the memory is still fresh. It's an awful thing to think about and you just never think it will happen to someone you know

    Reinventing Neesha ❤️

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    1. So sorry to hear that Neesha! The memory is always there but sometimes we have to focus on other memories -- like the good times. :]

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  2. My thoughts and prayers go out to KJ and her family. I hope she's at peace.

    I've experienced death in the family before but my aunt's death five years ago affected me the most. She had cancer, and she died in January 2010. She thought of me as a daughter she never had and I think that hurts a lot especially since I didn't see her during her last few weeks. But it makes me happy to believe she is in heaven, smiling and eating strawberries while watching Korean game shows. We use to do that when I visited. I still miss her very much.

    xx Bash | Bash Says Hey | bloglovin'

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    1. I hope she's at peace as well. So sorry to hear about your aunt! But at least you two had a powerful relationship & that can linger even after her passing. :]

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  3. There have been a few people over the years that I've been loosely connected to in some way that have died. Most shocking was when a friend of a friend was murdered in her home along with her entire family, we didn't even know until we saw it on the news. It's such a strange thing to be suddenly faced with the mortality of you and everyone you love, it really puts things in perspective.

    Really sorry to hear this news but just let it be a reminder to appreciate everyone you still have in your life, and to make the most of your own life!

    Alex
    efflorescentdream.co.uk
    x

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    1. Oh gosh, that's horrifying. Mortality is such a strange thing. One moment you're alive & one you're not. It's that simple & that fast. Let's make the most of every moment! :]

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  4. Over the years I've sadly laid to rest multiple friends and family due to cancer, the Iraqi war, drugs, old age, and even murder. Through it all I've found that death is hardest on the ones left behind. The ones who never get to say goodbye. The people who realize life will always be a little bit different now that they're gone. But the single thing that has helped me through each devastating loss is the certainty in my heart that this is not our home. We are on this earth for the quickest wisp of air before we head back to our home. And it is in our real home that we will once again be reunited with the ones we love and miss so dearly. So making the most out of life is something I try to strive for each and every day, enjoying each season as it changes. Not taking anything for granted. KJ and her family will definitely be in my prayers

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    1. So true. Death is hard on those left behind. That said, we should enjoy this wisp of air while we have it then we can look forward to the next wisp in the next home. :]

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  5. Aw I'm sorry girl :( Two girls I went to high school with died unexpectedly and it really freaked me out. It's really strange when a peer passes away, even if you don't know them that well.

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    1. Very true. It's just strange or humbling. Death does not discriminate.

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  6. :-( I'm sorry.. Hope u feel better soon. Xoxo

    http://www.sweetsimpleday.com

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    1. I am hoping her family can feel better more than myself! But thank you. :]

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  7. I feel so sorry for her. We don't know until when we're going to live so it's best to spend it with with the best people you would always want to be with.

    Stay safe always.

    xoxo,
    SHAIRA
    www.missdream-girl.blogspot.com

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    1. Well said! That most definitely rings true. :]

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  8. I am so sorry that you're in pain. Sending prayers to your community.

    I think the death that I took the hardest was my grandfather's. He was elderly, fought in two wars, and was a cancer survivor. He always told us that if the cancer came back, he would never do chemo. The last time I visited with him, he was going to see a doctor that afternoon. My dad called me to let me know that he had actually set up chemo and radiation treatments that afternoon! He passed away that evening. I was devastated, but I was just so happy to know that he was at peace and reunited with all of his war buddies up in Heaven.

    XX, SS || A Little Seersucker Sass

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    1. Life works in mysterious ways. How interesting that the day he was going into chemo he passed away. At least he can be in peace & pain free now. :]

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  9. Incredibly written post. I'm so sorry for your pain. Life does work in super mysterious ways. I lost my dad when I was 7 to cancer and I've sadly had to say goodbye to numerous other family members. It's sad to say but death has been such a "big part" of my life that I kind of learned how to deal with it. Don't get me wrong, I still miss my dad every single day but I learned how to give it a place, I strongly believe he's always with me somehow. I have to believe that or I don't know how else I would have learned how to deal with it. It definitely made me a different person. Sending you all the positive vibes in the world <3 XO Naomi in Wonderland

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    1. Thank you for sharing your story, Naomi. I'm with you in that I believe they are with you -- be it their memory, part of their spirit, or some other unexplainable phenomenon. Positive vibes to you as well. :]

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  10. My condolences! I lost my best friend 7 years ago, and it was horrible. I suffered tremendously, but my perspective of life changed. I believed I had time to do everything I wanted to do, so I just let time go by. If we don't appreciate the moment and do what we really want now, letting time go by is not the best choice. We should just enjoy life at its fullest :)


    Joanne Black

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    1. Sometimes we must experience something to learn how to cope with it, unfortunately. Life is fleeting so as you said, enjoy it to the fullest. :]

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  11. I am so sorry about this, Carmen, I know how hard it is. I lost my college best friend a few years ago and it was devastating. We drifted apart after college, only bumping into each other a few times. One day, I went to buy food in a restaurant within my condo area and heard people gossiping about a poor girl whom fell to her death from 10th floor from the condo block opposite of mine and that her death was all over the newspaper. Naturally I got curious and picked up the paper and imagine my shock when I saw it was her. Apparently her bf pushed her down...

    Sorry, this is so bitter for me...am actually crying while typing this. Stay strong, and I'm really sorry you're going through this.

    Shireen | Reflection of Sanity

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    1. I'm sorry Shireen! Hopefully typing your comment was slightly cathartic & not totally terrible. I understand how it can be bitter, especially when someone else purposely ends somebody's life. It's so hard to bare. Much love! <3

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  12. Hope you are okay, and sending hugs your way.

    There is a TED talk on loss that has always stuck with me, where a guys says, "I always gotta make something good. You just gotta take something bad, and make something good." I have tried to focus on this through the loss of loved ones and in community deaths.

    A couple of weeks ago there was a day-time attempted robbery shooting in our neighborhood. Since then many members of our community have stepped up to fight back against crime and potentially dangerous situations, fund off duty police presence and attend community safety meetings, along with donating to the victim's family. It is tremendous to see strangers coming together around keeping the entire neighborhood a safe and welcoming place.

    A similar thing happened with a drug-related car accident of a dear friend in high school. It was one of the first losses our class had suffered, and it really made people stop and think about their own decisions - and appreciate one another a little more.

    In the latter situation, I mourned for the loss of a friend and wonderful person, but also found a new sense of gratitude for the precious time I have been given. Death separates us from the minds and bodies of our friends, but not from their soul and the memories we hold of them. xx

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    1. I will have to listen to that TED talk; those talks are always so relevant & thought provoking. As you said, sometimes terrible occurrences can help rally a community together. I can see that in my own; there's a vigil, a fundraiser, & people helping one another because if this horrific incident. Let's enjoy our lives for as long as we have them! :]

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  13. Oh no, I'm sorry this happened! Death is something incredibly difficult to deal with. It doesn't matter whether you knew the person well or not, just knowing you won't be able to see them again or get to know them is a hard concept to wrap your head around. My husband's father died earlier last month, and it's been really tough on us, even though I didn't have a close relationship to him. It's just so shocking. Hope it gets better for you, just keep positive :) I'm sure her family appreciates your concern and kind words

    www.littleblackshell.com

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    1. You hit the nail on the head! The concept of death is so overwhelming & unknown, it's hard to wrap your head around it. Positive vibes are send to you & your husband! :]

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  14. A friend of mine who I lost touch with recently passed and besides him I don't have too much experience with death. I've had a loved one pass several years back but he was a great-grandparent and as sad as that was you almost condition yourself to expect that one day they wont be there. As I write this I feel like I'm sounding pretty disconnected from it and I think its also because I don't really deal with the idea of death (both because of a lack of experience and by choice). I guess it scares me even though I know its something we'll all face in the end. Its something I don't think any of us will truly understand and when someone dies (whether you knew them or not) we're reminded of that fact.

    I hope you're doing ok with it all.

    -M
    www.violetroots.com

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    1. I don't think you're disconnectrf; I think it's just because it hasn't happened to you, it's just hard to fathom. That's not a bad thing! I lost my grandma last year & it's so odd to think that I can't call her anymore or smell her signature perfume. Positive vibes to you! :]

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  15. So sorry to hear this :(. My aunt passed away a while ago. It was definitely difficult especially seeing how my cousins (her kids) cope with it since they lost her at a young age. However, I think we all eventually learn to continue to live life with time, but it's important to always honor and remember them too.

    Tina
    www.justatinabit.com

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    1. Death is hardest on those left behind. Luckily, your cousins have family to help them get through their tough time. So true, it's important to honor & remember those who are no longer with us. :]

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